Only My Boyfriend Gets to Touch My Hair and Eat with his Mouth Full

So every week we gather in Kelly's room and every week we gather hope for this week's episode to mark the triumphant return of Gossip Girl and every week we are left saying "I think next week's going to be good though." Our level of unhappiness is shown in the heightened time we allow ourselves to watch One Tree Hill to satisfy our need for absurd drama. Today it was up to twenty minutes. I do actually have some hope for next week though. This week's was better (all the Derota face time), though I did have to hold down some vomit during the Chuck/Vanessa nastiness. It's even worse knowing they do that in real life too. I was also very proud of myself for totally calling that the fanmail was from Dan's brother (I'm going to kill Writing Teen Fiction next semester. Absolutely kill!).

But Ok, I didn't really have anything to say about Gossip Girl. I just wanted an excuse to post that picture of Dream Me with Dream Boyfriend with Dream Hot Dog. The only thing that could make that picture better was if Kristen Bell was eating something with cheese on it that was toasted. Now that'd be perfection.

Blast From the Past

So my friend Kelly posted this video of this seven year old stealing his grandma's car and while watching it I was reminded of an old YouTube classic with a younger look-a-like to the Lil Mister Grand Theft Auto. Enjoy:

Loooooogan (and that Meg girl)

I haven't even watched this yet because I'm on the phone with the BF and I already didn't speak for the first minute of the phone call becaues I was in the middle of watching the Pharrell McDonald's video but I cannot wait!

Something Funny Happened on the Way to the 12th Floor

So I was riding the elevator up to my room with one of my friends roommates Tanya. If you've met me then you know I'm really awkward at small talk. It's almost as bad as me at phone talk. Luckily, Tanya picked it up when she told me that I looked "just like that actress". I of course inquired as to which actress and after many floors of thinking she was finally able to come up with: "That girl he's going to marry in I Love You, Man."

That's right. Rashida Jones. Apparently, I look just like Quincy Jones' daughter. This could be my family portrait:
Maybe if Quincy was Jewish instead of black. That could be why Rashida is so not into that kiss. She knows that's not her real dad and she's late for meeting her bio papa at a Lower East Side bagel shop. I'm not going to lie though. The first thing I did when I got back to my room was google Rashida Jones obsessively looking for any similarities between the two of us. But why don't you judge for yourself:
Vincenzo took the words right out of my mouth when he said "Identical strangers? Holy mackarel, that's amazing!" The resemblance is eerie, right? Now it's just like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the paparazzi to start camping outside of Loeb snapping photos of me coming home from class thinking I'm Rashida. My life is soooo hard.

Sad Wednesday

I'm not usually affected by celebrity deaths but I'm really upset by Natasha Richardson's passing. I can't even imagine what her family is going through right now.

RIP

WUNA Must Be So Proud

I've always said I've grown up in the best neighborhood and apparently the APA agreed with me (in 2007, but still).

Damn You MILF Island!

Ever since that goddamn episode of 30 Rock whenever I see the name Deborah I automatically pronounce it as "deBORah"

What School?

So as I prepare to head out for the wondrous gift of spring break I thought I'd share a little bit about why I sometimes love the New School.
That is my midterm. Two alien mothers: one beautiful, one ugly. How can you not love a school where you can take a class, talk about robots all day, and instead of papers you make collages? Plus, I got a few bf's in the class so that's an added bonus.

The List

Some people make lists of Christmas presents (Sarah), others make lists with their friends of people they made out with and post it on facebook with everyone included tagged (Jasper). I make lists of short, trashy, and gay guys aka the loves of my life. So here we go. Sadie's Celeb Crush Breakdown. March 2009.

Let's start with my first celeb obsession. David Boreanaz, more commonly known as Angel. I think this is where most of my fetish started.
I mean, these pictures say it all. This is where I got my fucked up standards. Do you see that asshole brooding in the first pic? (I would have put one of him going vamp, but I'd rather look at him in a see through shirt than with an effed up face) Do you see the Tool Academy oozing off him in the second? And the flames of the third? There are two things wrong with him though. Number one, the height. Boy is taaaall. For me, at least. But more importantly, he did this:
It's just too creepy. There is only one creep allowed in the relationship and that is me. Plus, it's like he's channeling Ethan Hawk as opposed to his usual sexy Nick Lachey thing. In the end, let's see how he fared:
Height: 6'1" Trashy: 6/10 Gay: 3/10

Next up, Paul Rudd.
Paul only needs one picture. Look at that scruff! That pose! Those eyes staring into my soul, begging me to take off my clothes or paint his nails. We're so in love.
Height: 5' 9" Trashy: 0/10 Gay: 4/10

Another sexy comedian who stole my heart: James Roday.
Boy combines all my favorite things: Psychics, lying, hotness, trashiness, gayness, and Model Behavior girl plus Luck of the Irish leprechaun PLUS Budd PLUS amazing aliases (Gus "T.T." Showbiz and Shawn SpenStar) Though he did apparently look like this once:
But did I mention he's hispanic? Totally makes up for the over-trash.
Height: 5'10 1/2" Trashy: 7 (Mainly because when he's not acting he has a major permascowl) Gay: 8 (But mainly bromance gay with Gus)

Let's see if you can guess my next beau by our future plans together:
First, I blow him. Then, I poke him.

If you guessed any character from Arrested Development I'd accept it, but if you guessed Jason Batemen you'd get a free cup of GoBias coffee!
Marry me!
God, I am just having a love affair with him (though, I could go for that ice cream sandwich). I'm sorry about all the Arrested jokes. I'll just move on.
Height: 6' Trashy: 0/10 Gay: 3/10

And now for something waaaaay gayer! Hugh Jackman, ladies and gentlemen!
If this isn't one of the trashiest, gayest things you've ever seen then send me what is. The best part about Hugh is you get the trash, you get the gay, and you get the sexy, sexy man.
It's hard to stare at that for too long. He's almost dangerously hot.
Height: 6'2 1/2" Trashy: 4/10 Gay: 7/10

I gotta speed this up though, since I'm on the phone with my boyfriend. He's actually rating them along with me and he is always spot on.

I know it's kind of weird, but I am so attracted to Charlie Kelly/Charlie Day. Like seriously, he might be my top celebrity I would marry. No, he is. Ok, I said it. Deal with it.
Height: 6'1" (or so he claims. I refuse to believe this) Trashy: 7/10 Gay: 9/10

BJ Novak
Anyone who can create the character of Ryan and start the fire will always have a place in my heart
Height: 5' 81/2" Trashy: 7/10 Gay: 2/10

You all knew it was coming....Chuck Bass
No commentary necessary.
Height: 5' 9 1/2" Trashy: 9/10 Gay: 10/10

Michael C. Hall
Height: 5'10 1/2 Trashy: 5 Gay: 4/10

Jensen Ackles aka Hot Dean from Supernatural
Jensen is known as the better half of Wincest, little did we know that Jensen has been flaming a loong time before he ever went on the ghost hunt.
Height: 6' 1" Trashy: 10/10 Gay: 9/10

Zachary Quinto
Most people know him as Sylar. I know him as this:
Height: 6'1" Trashy: 7/10 Gay: 8/10

And of course, the boys from Veronica Mars:
Beav (And yes, I know that this is my third serial killer. I have issues, Ok)
Height: 5' 8 1/2" Trashy: 5/10 Gay: 7/10
Dick
Height: 6'1" Trashy: 10/10 Gay: 0/10
Logan
Height: 6' Trashy: 7/10 Gay: 10/10

I'm sure none of that was entertaining. But I'll at least leave you with this:

The New John Mayer

Ok. So he doesn't sing, but he has taken over the YouTube of my heart. Matthew Gray Gubler, you make me want to watch Criminal Minds.


That's just the first video. There are so many more, each one funnier than the next. And here's him practicing for our wedding night.



Love at first play, right?

Life After Mars

With so many amazing television shows on the on their way out or on their way to suckdom (Battlestar, Heroes, Flight of the Conchords, LOST, Gossip Girl) I am getting so excited about upcoming series debuts or just discovering new series, especially since so many feature so many of my favorite VMars LoVers. Here's a little run-down of where we can spot all of our old besties.

1. Jason Dohring in Washingtonienne (HBO) and Party Down (Starz)
Washingtonienne: "A comedy that revolves around the professional and personal lives of three smart, sophisticated twenty-something girls working on Capitol Hill. "
The show also stars Amanda Walsh who is a fellow Veronica alumn playing Meryl in the season three episode "Of Vice and Men." I don't know how good this one will be but I'll give it a shot. It is HBO so it won't be horrible I think.
Party Down: "A group of actors move to LA to make it big, but end up working as caterers."
This is a Rob Thomas show. Enough said. This is the best place to catch all your V faves and it's on Starz so hopefully it'll be racey and wonderful. Maybe with some of that great race humor for Veronica that we all loved (V: Do you have any enemies? W: You mean, besides the KKK?)


2.Francis Capra in Castle (ABC)

(Yeah, he IS the kid from Kazam)

It's only a one episode gig, but I'd watch anything for Weevil. Plus, Nathon Fillion's on it and even though I wasn't a Firefly fan I know the man has pretty good taste.


3. Enrico Colantoni in Flashpoint (CBS) and ZOS: Zones of Separation (?)
Flashpoint: "A television program about a special tactical team that rescues hostages, busts gangs, defuses bombs, and takes on other tough cases."
ZOS: "The best Canadian show on television"
I'm much more interested in the second show, mainly because it's Canadian and they gave me Degrassi and Celine and the fact that Papa Mars is playing a character named "Speedo Boy." It's also described as a Drama and War show so I'm interested how Canada, Speedos, and War all fit together.


4.Ryan Hansen in Lily (CW) Rockville, CA (CW online), and Party Down (Starz)

(RIP Beav)

Though I'm a little doubtful of the Gossip Girl spinoff, now that Dick has signed on to be one of Lily's lovers I am on the edge of my seat. Plus, Gia is playing Lily's sister so maybe Dick will finally realize his goal of tapping that too. If he plays any character other than Dick Casablancas /JJJ (from That's So Raven of course) I'll be a little angry. I only love Dick because he's my big hunky beef man. I think Julie Brown said it best in Earth Girls Are Easy: I like 'em big and stupid. Or short, trashy, and gay. Either one, for me.
And Rockville's produced by Josh Schwartz who aced the California teen show (at first) with The OC so I might give it a shot. It's a webseries though, so it can't be that great.


5.Teddy Dunn in Nothing
What has two thumbs and doesn't give a flying fuck about Teddy Dunn unless he's faking drunk? Thiiiis girl!


6. Andre in Big Love (HBO)
So I used to watch Big Love when it was first on and then I stopped having HBO and never quite got back into it. With Tina Majorino and Amanda Seyfried I think I might have the right motavation to start again.


7.Chris Lowell in Private Practice (ABC)
Each time I watch season three I fall in love with Piz a bit more, but even his charm could never get me to watch the spinoff when I've fallen off the Grey's wagon.


8. Amanda Seyfried in Big Love (HBO)
See #6


9. Ken Marino in Reaper (CW), In the Motherhood (ABC) and Party Down
I haven't seen that many episodes of Reaper but what I have seen is so incredibly hilarious and underrated. I think I might go DVD it from Abeid or Rentertainment BF this summer. And In the Motherhood has Cheryl Hines and Megan Mullally. That's a pretty solid trifecta of at least a its-bad-but-so-good show possibility.


10. Alyson Hannigan in How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
This is probably my favorite show that I've never actually watched. It's on top of my summer watch list. Right now I'm re-watching some Buffy so that will get me through my Alyson Hannigan withdrawl until then.


11. Ryan Devlin in Party Down (Starz)
Mercer totally gave me the skeevs even before the thought that he was the Hearst rapist ever crossed my mind but I feel like he has an inner "Got Me Again!" that will just crack me up in this show.


12. Adam Scott in Party Down (Starz)
Speaking of people who skeeved me out on Veronica Mars who are rapists (this one of the statutory kind), I feel like I will just loooove V's favorite teacher/big letdown in this show. I think in Party Down I'd let him put on Rolling Stones and roll around in his black satin sheets.

Baby, One More Time

So people always have YouTube videos as their facebook statuses and I always get so disappointed when I watch them and they just aren't up to par. There is a certain level of hilarity one expects from a facebook status level video link. I expect to laugh, maybe cry, possibly pee my pants a little bit. There are so many hilarious videos out there and if you're going to brag and show off that you found the next big knee-slapper you better not be hot dogging for nothing. After another linked disappointment, I decided to watch an old classic I discovered with my dear friend Sarah to cheer me up. I hope it does the same for you.