You Can Not Has Cheezburger

So I haven't written a real post in a long time and I'm still not going to today. Instead, I'm just going to post this:

I would totally go see this as a full length feature but I know it'd just end up like that time Sarah and I rented the "Kittens!" dvd. You think it'll be awesome, but it's just really boring after about seven minutes.

The Gig is Up

Yes, I watch American Idol. I'll admit it. But only because it's a thing I do with my boyfriend. We watch, we judge, we mock, we predict but most importantly, we don't vote. I don't care that much about Idol. It's just become this bonding thing we do together. I'm not a Claymate or a FANtasia or even a Glambert. But that does lead me into my next discussion.

Adam Lambert. Gay. Straight. Bi. Who cares? Well, a lot of people do which is why I think Adam is declining to comment. This guy Googles himself so much he bases his hairstyles of how fans prefer him. Boy is playing the game! Hence, the maybe not wanting to come out of the closet in the middle of a competition whose winner is almost entirely chosen by a bunch of middle-aged and tween Christian girls. He really has nothing to worry about. He's already won which kind of has taken all the fun out of watching (along with the fact I'm a billion miles away from my boyfriend and therefore are now watching without him, his soda to steal, his popcorn, or just anyone to listen to my wardrobe critques and snarky comments). My point is people are getting all up into a fuss about Adam mainly due to these photographs. After I first saw these I never really followed the dramz further until I came across this video:

First off: Sepia tone? This is 2009!!! I can make phone calls and play music through a windbreaker and you can even record a color video?
Before I was even given enough time to recover from the color scheme and horrible animations (kiss lips, really?) I was hit with maybe one of the stupidest things I have ever heard on the Internet. "Good looking people aren't gay."
I'm sorry, what? If that is how this girl bases sexuality she is in for a looooong life of singleness. It also just goes to support my theory that because of Adam Lambert. in eight years or so America will be overrun with faghags who fell so head-over-heels for the Glam Man that they went for guys like him the rest of their lives. Guys who meticulously styled their hair, wore makeup, tight fitting and fashionable clothing, overdramatic songs/showtumes, and--Oh yeah, make out with dudes. I know there are a lot of gay guys who aren't like that and there are a lot of straight guys who are, but stereotypes are often based on truths or result in them becoming true. I also don't get who this girl thinks is running the big Adam Lambert conspiracy but she seems very upset about it (fist slam!!!!). This girl goes on to tell the audience to "have an open mind" and that he can't be gay! He's Christian!!!! This girl needs to open her mind and smell the glitter!

I'm really sorry about this post. It's terrible. So forgive me, Sarah.

You Have Got to Anticipate Me!

So basically for the past week and a half I've mentioned Weekend at Bernie's Two fairly often, probably daily. I just couldn't possibly figure out the basis for a sequel and then once I looked it up it sounded to absurd to be true. Here's the wiki summary:
It is the sequel to the 1989 comedy Weekend at Bernie's and continues the misadventures of two young executives, Larry Wilson (Andrew McCarthy) and Richard Parker (Jonathan Silverman), and their deceased boss, Bernie Lomax (Terry Kiser). In the first film, Larry and Richard were forced to create the illusion that Bernie was still alive in order to avoid being killed themselves. In the sequel, Larry and Richard plot to use Bernie to find treasure he had buried at the Virgin Islands. Before stuffing the body into a suitcase and heading for fortune, however, Bernie is partially revived in a botched voodoo ceremony and made to walk toward the hidden treasure whenever he hears music.
I'm obsessed. It sounds like Earth Girls Are Easy quality almost. I just need to see it. But anyways, I've been talking about it none stop and I went to see Flight of the Conchords tonight (it was amazing by the way) and in the middle of "Jenny" Bret busted out into a Weekend at Bernie's Two discussion and I could not contain myself. It was like he read my mind. Maybe I should put out mind ads like this guy. Also, Bret was looking a little beat down but Jermaine was looking fiiiiiine. I've officially switched teams. Speaking of people who look suprisingly attractive:

Oh yeah, and go to the rescue. Or at least check out all the videos.
XOXO,
Gossip Gennis

Totally (Does Not) Look Like

So all day I've been seeing the Kourtney Kardashian Maxim pictures and I seriously do not understand how no one pointed out the absurd amount of photoshopping done to her. So much to the point where no matter how long I stare, after watching so many episodes of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, I just cannot recognize her. It looks like a completely different person.
Is it just me? Or am I being crazy that they did photoshop overload? And speaking of people who don't look like how they normally do...
Based on this picture alone, I would actually bang Freddie Prinze Jr. And now I want to watch Head Over Heels again.

Great.

Glamour-ughhh (Flossy, Flossy)

So I was just catching up on some blogs after class today and was reading an article on Jezebel about how Glamour did a "Best Suit for Your Body" kind of deal and actually showed different bodies. Yay, for them and all that. I do have to give them credit for showing off different bodies but I just cannot believe how terrible wrong their advice was for a girl in my situation. I fall under the category of "busty" and according to Glamour 1/2 of the best suits for me are essentially crap.
A bandeau top? Are you kidding me? And that blue onesie is none the better. They also have to be joking with that bottom left purple triangle top. I had to abandon triangle tops before I was abandoned body glitter! They even say in the Do's and Dont's to abandon the triangle. It just really irked me because us busty, skinny girls have a real issue finding fitting swimwear and it can be done! This spread is just the opposite of helpful. Just because a suit comes in "D" or "DD" does not actually mean it is meant to hold in twins that big. Last year though, I was able to find a swimsuit in my size (30G) that was a cute bikini and not a tankini. So for anyone else out there who has trouble getting cute, fitting, and not outrageously expensive swimsuits or bras check out Figleaves. It is my God (but hopefully only until June 1 when I say goodbye to Mary-Kate and Ashley and say hello to cheap Target swim suits!)

Sunny Sunday

After being sick and a rainy weekend in which I had to trek all over Williamsburg the sun has finally come out (literally and figuratively). I got my ideal apartment (more to come on that later), I'm healthy, I have food in my cabinets again, I'm going to a tarot reading at 3. This is the start of a brand new day. A beautiful, hardwood floored, exposed brick, garden apartment kind of day where I am regularly blessed with images like this one from Sarah:
So let's just all rejoice, put cheese on something and toast it!

They Forgot Oranjello

If you like that, you might also want to check out Black People Love Us. Or just Veronica Mars.