Oct 31, 2008

Culture Shock

Hawaiian girl: Is college basketball big here?
Students: At the New School? God, no.
Hawaiian girl: No, on the mainland.

Oct 25, 2008

Now Angel and I Have Something in Common

I finally solved the mystery of why I haven't seen a goddamn celebrity. I'm cursed! It's not like I can't ever sleep with my true lover or Avada Kedavra, none of that shit. I just can only meet psuedo celebrities when I go to a club with a certain friend. I think I can live with that. Especially when they look like this:
So hot. He's the singer of this band Young Love and we just kind of stumbled into their show. My friend even grabbed his ass, he wasn't even phased. What a keeper.

Oct 24, 2008

What has two thumbs, a sour face, and looks like Andy Bernard?



This guy!



Oct 23, 2008

Psych: Getting Muffed by the Media Everwhere

My friend Thomas and I seem to be the only die-hard fans of Psych. A travesty by my standards, but a discrimination I could live with. What I cannot stand on the other hand is the blatant copying of my Beloved. For example, The Mentalist. Let's do a little run-down:

Psych: Shawn Spencer is the Santa Barbara, CA police station's independent psychic
Mentalist: Patrick Jane is the California Bureau of Investigation's independent consultant

P: He uses his impeccable observation skills to solve cases and convinces others he is psychic
M: He uses his impeccable observation skills to solve cases and used to convince others he was psycic

P: He is known for ignoring protocol
M: He is known for ignoring protocol

P: His skills are valued by all except Head Detective Carlton Lassiter, who constantly insults Shawn's techniques, but now and then will reluctantly acknowledge his help

M: His skills are valued by all except Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon, who constantly insults Patrick's techniques, but now and then will reluctantly acknowledge his help

P: Shawn is praised for his charm and ability to solve tough cases, but looked down upon for his
disregard of the rules
M:
Patrick is praised for his charm and ability to solve tough cases, but looked down upon for his disregard of the rules

Similar a bit? I would think so. The Mentalist is just Psych minus the humor and who wants that? I know I sure don't. So I say fuck The Mentalist. If it issues a disclaimer stating "Yes, we know we stole everything from Psych but took all the good parts out. I hope you enjoy this piece of shit" then maybe I'd reconsider my boycott.

I'd also just like to point out a little mentioned fact. The Jimmy Smits accidental stabbing is straight out of the Psych episode Lights, Camera...Homicidio. Both stabbings were done by latin actors who thought they were using a prop knife. As my dad would say, "Coincidence...or fact?"

Either way Psych is everywhere but for some reason the media seems to have a vendetta against it. Luckily for SpenStar and Gus "TT" Showbiz they don't need any mass media promotion. This should last a lifetime.



I Got a 12 Pack of Celebrity, but What I Want is a Handle.

I've been in NYC two months now, right in the heart of the Village. There's always something filming and celebrities strutting about the area. My friend sneezes, Joseph Gordon-Levitt says "Bless you." She drops her stuff on the street, Elizabeth Berkely picks it up. You know who I've seen?This guy. That's right, two months in the city and all I have to show for it is 12 pack from the I Love New York/Money. That's it. What the frak is up with that? I came to New York expecting to bump into celebrities and then be so non-chalant about it that they fall in love with me ask and me if I'd like to go out dinner with them and their friends from Gossip Girl later. What is the point in living in a big city if you never get to gawk at celebrities? I'm not asking for JGL to excuse my allergies, I'd settle for that Kirstie Alley wannabe repremanding me when I burped. Just give me something!

Oct 22, 2008

Mythic Creature or My New BFF?



The answer to that question is obviously my new best friend forevs. As a fan of everything oversized, miniturized, and furry this is like a dream come true. It hits two of my three favorite categories (a feat only previously accomplished by my disproportianate cat Faust).


This picture is my dreams come true and more. Is it even necessary to point out the sheer awesomeness of it's owner? No. The beret, the awkward smile, the Cosby sweater-it says it all.

It is necessary, however, to point out that he reminds me slightly of my dad but a little less Steve Martin and wearing wooden shoes.


One day I will own one of these and name him Rufus (Roofie for short) and he'll carry my other rabbits-to-be (Benjamin Linus and Baxter) around rodent koala-cab. Happily ever after...

PS. Watch out about showing this picture to your stoner friends. We once had to take away a friend's debit card to stop her from purchasing one of these bad boys after she and Mary-Jane had a little too much fun.